A shortlist of men I wish that I could hex, but I just don’t have the energy

  1. He was a stranger, and he knew which car in the parking lot at work was hers. She knew that he’d been watching her, but only because of the notes he left on her windshield.
  2. He knows who he is, and he is not ashamed of himself. He knows what he did, and he doesn’t see the problem with it.
  3. He swaggered up to her, gave her that conspicuous once-over we all know so well, and said, “You’re cute. Call me.” He slipped her a piece of paper. Upon unfolding it, she found his name, address, and phone number written in sloppy chicken-scratch. She looked up. He winked, pursed his lips, and walked away.
  4. He stopped her on the floor at work. He wanted her to know how beautiful she is, how nice her ass is, and what’s her phone number, does she have a Snapchat?
  5. He stalked her around campus every day for weeks on end. He showed up outside of her classes, sat at the table next to hers wherever she was eating lunch, was hovering when she was at work and where she was hanging out.
  6. He put something in the bottle of Diet Coke she’d been leaving in his fridge for when she comes over to hang out. We all know how that story ends.
  7. He came up to the circulation desk at the library to check out his materials the moment a young woman got on the clock. When he was giving her his card, he would position it in his hand such that he would always manage to touch her skin. He’d try to intercept her hand again when she went to set the card on the counter or hand him back his items.
  8. He tried to coerce her out from behind the checkout counter. He was not happy when she requested that her (male) manager assist him.
  9. She was sixteen years old. Half a decade between then and now has hardly made it easier.
  10. He circled around her block to see if her car was in the driveway, if the light was on in her house. He tried to call at least three times a day. He hovered around outside the door sometimes when she wasn’t home.
  11. He left things for her on her doorstep. She knew it was him. He knew that she knew it was him. And he just wanted a little bit of gratitude, or he might just take back what he paid for.
  12. He screamed at her from across the street, “WHERE YA GOIN’ ALL ALONE, SWEETHEART?”
  13. They came up to the table where she was sitting by herself at the bar, standing on all sides of her, aggressively close. She couldn’t see around them to make panic eyes at her boyfriend. She wanted to get up, but she didn’t want to touch them. She didn’t want them to touch her.

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